If you don’t have anything nice to say...

So Tuesday was the first day of school. Happy day. And then.

The brother of my dear friend, TRPL TRBL, was tragically killed while riding his motorcycle on Angeles Crest Highway — just east of LA. I got the news that evening as my friend was being transported, via hired car, back to Boulder from a work event that the hubby was attending as well. I think time may have stopped. Or maybe it was just my brain. It was one of those knee-buckling moments that you never quite file away. I can barely write these words without crying. I called her in the car and we talked as she rode. Alone in the back of a Town Car.

So after all of the stuff: rushing to my friend’s side, crying buckets, toasting him with a bottle of wine vintage his birth year (1980), and so on...the friends were off to CA to mourn. And I was still here. Waiting for the hubby to return from his trip. I was so tired of being alone. Even with friends and neighbors, I just needed him here. He was having a tough time too and having to grin and bear it through countless meetings and conference sessions. It sucked. Still does.

Today, I talked to TRPL TRBL and she said it was in today’s paper. The first thing I found was an article. Then I realized she meant the obit. I found that too. But not before making the error of reading some of the posted comments. Rage overtook me as I looked through the various assumptions of idiots who said, in essence, “another one bites the dust.” These people decided that he was obviously at fault. Guilty-as-charged. And they have no f-ing idea. And what difference does it make anyway? He’s gone. In the prime of his life.

So I registered myself on the site and posted a comment. Something to the effect of, “have some decency and realize this was a person who left people behind.” Damn it. And they took that as an opening to focus their tirades on me. A grieving friend.

I really can’t believe that people can be such insensitive jerks. Really.

So, on that note, I thought I’d include some words from our departed friend and brother, David, that ring so true and important in the wake of what happened to him:

October 1, 2005
Friends and family,

Today was my first taste of Oktoberfest as I arrived this afternoon into Munich. It was great and you will all hear more after I take some time to think about my grandfather`s death, which I just received word about. Although I knew this was coming it has still left me very stunned.

So perhaps we could all take some time today to call a family member and let them know of our love. It won`t take long (well, the longer the better) and it will bring a smile to both faces on each end of the line. If I can make a call overseas then you can use your weekend minutes to tell someone whom you don`t often see or talk to that you love them.

Love,
David

You do that. And we’ll all try to go on without this bright, shining light.

TODAY’S THEME SONG: Lazy Eye. Silverspun Pickups. I’ve been waiting. I’ve been waiting for this silence all night long. It’s just a matter of time. To appear sad.