True That

I read something today about a couple in New Zealand who are in a skirmish with the government over the name they chose for their baby boy. The name? 4Real. Seriously. With the number and everything. Apparently the New Zealand government has safeguards in place to prevent parents from setting their kids up for a lifetime of torture…

I wasn’t as lucky — those laws are not on our books. But thankfully my mother decided against naming me Daisy. The deal with that would have been just horrific. A girl from the South named Daisy. And right about the time I’m hitting self-conscious puberty stage: The Dukes of Hazzard. I think you see where I’m heading.

Speaking of dear old mom (sister, you brought this on yourself ☺), she has kept things lively of late. First, she calls in a panic because her cell phone bill was $75 over the usual amount. And she doesn’t know how to get online to see the itemized statement. She tries. And tries some more. But “just can’t get it to work!” I ask for her login. “I don’t remember.” I ask for her password, “ It might be….” “Never mind.” After numerous attempts to have it sent to me via entering the answer to the secret question, I finally just call them. “My mom is just not the most computer literate person. It has mostly to do with the fact that she hates typing.” After a quick verification call to mom’s cell, the woman says — without pause — “Her password is lkiss.” “What?” “Yes. That’s it. L-K-I-S-S.” “Are you sure?” “Positive.” “What the hell?” “And her secret question is florence.” “Florence? That’s her question?” “It certainly is. And the answer is Poot.” At that, I finally hear her chuckle. What she didn’t know was that part made the most sense of it all. Gotta love my mom.

So it ended up that no one was all that angry about my skipping out this past weekend. Maybe they’re all just used to it by now. And who really wants a neurotic, unpredictable person around their kids anyway. Better that I am close to the vice president instead. He’s used to it. ☺

Miss 6 is in heaven this week. She’s back at her preschool for summer camp and Nanners is there too. They are loving being the big kids and being together. A full day isn’t nearly enough. So Nanners came home with Miss 6 on Tuesday and we baked cupcakes (the sample product from a company the b-partner and I did a pitch to last week) then went out to dinner. That made for a 9 to 7 day for those two. And I’d say it still wasn’t enough. There’s always tomorrow…

So kids, I’m off to the southland for a few days. Parental strife has officially hit the point of no return. It ain’t good times. But, in the words of my dear, late Granny, “This too shall pass.” Catch ya on the flip side.

TODAY’S THEME SONG: If I Had a Million Dollars. BNL. …I’d buy you a green dress. But not a real green dress, that’s cruel…